Tactics for Tackling Difficult People in Life and Work

There are five key factors that you need to take into account when tackling difficult behaviour. Understand these and you'll be in a stronger position to manage or work round the difficult person. This lesson explains what they are, and why it is vital to tackle the unwanted behaviour, than to attack the difficult person's character.

There are an infinite number of ways that people can be difficult. Some are strident and noisy, others more passive, withdrawn, moody or brooding. In this lesson we outline seven types of 'character' – clusters of behaviour that can be difficult to deal with. With the help of role-plays you'll learn to identify these 'characters', and spot the patterns of behaviour that need to be interrupted.

It also explains why it is vital to avoid the temptation of labelling people; the descriptions used here are for learning purposes only.

There are four essential skills that you'll need to brush up on if you want to communicate effectively and get your point across in the face of difficult behaviour. The good news is that these are skills you already have, you probably just haven't thought about them this way before. Once you know what they are, you can practice them; they'll allow you to be more confident and have more control in those difficult interactions.

There are three questions to ask yourself before setting out to tackle difficult behaviour. Is the nasty behaviour a one-off, or is it more persistent and repetitive? Is it causing harm or damage, or it is just a little inconvenient? In short, how much energy and effort will you need to tackle the behaviour, and are you ready for it?

This lesson uses an approached called 'The Three Cs' to help you think through some of the pitfalls, and prepare yourself before you try a new strategy with the difficult person.

In this lesson you will learn the five steps to getting the upper hand with challenging behaviour. It explains how to avoid triggering an unpleasant reaction in the other person, and the five 'golden rules' that will put you in control. Understanding what you want and expect, and communicating it to the other person clearly is a great start, but you'll also need to protect their dignity, to avoid getting side tracked.

The lesson also explains that, above all, you should abandon any notions of 'winning'.

One of the hardest parts of dealing with difficult behaviour is managing your emotions. When you are on the receiving end of behaviour you don’t like, it doesn’t take long for negative feelings to cloud your judgement and influence how you communicate.
This lesson looks at the skill-set you’ll need to separate thoughts and feelings, so you’ll be able to handle your emotions more effectively.

We've all been there, locked into a conversation that goes on and on without ever resolving anything! This lesson explains how you need to approach the problem between you and the difficult person, without getting drawn into irrelevant and unproductive detours. You will also learn that a simple change of focus can dramatically reduce the risk that a conversation becomes a conflict.

In simple language, you'll learn a powerful tactic for breaking the deadlock and developing forward momentum in tricky conversations.

How often to we embark on a conversation without thinking it through first. The chances are, if you do think it through you simply rehearse your fears by imagining everything that could go wrong. Or you come up with a plan which, despite your best intentions, you are unable to stick to once the talking starts.

To help you prepare, this lesson spells out six vital elements of the ASSUME Strategy. Taken together, these simple tactics will allow you ASSUME control, by taking a position where you are able to run the conversation.

When conversation has broken down to a point where it has become openly hostile, the SALVAGE Strategy provides a starting point to re-open communications.

In this concluding lesson we summarise and give pointers to consolidate the learning. At the heart of tackling Difficult behaviour lies good communication. But underlying that, in order to tackle the unwanted behaviour and get your message across, you must do it with sincerity and integrity.

Test what you've learned from from this course.