Deliver Powerful, Painless Feedback to Motivate vs Frustrate

Recommendation to optimize your learning: 1. Listen to the lectures on your commute in your car or at your desk.

2. Go back and click the small down arrow on the right side of the lecture title to open activities, worksheets, assessments and practices.

3. Whenever possible post your responses, insights and questions to share your experience and lessons learned.

Enjoy!. To your success!

Open the file below that asks two powerful questions.

Reflect on this concept of cognitive dissonance and relate it to the impact feedback has on the recipient, then write about your own experience in these two scenarios.

1. Describe by writing about a time when you received feedback that was empowering and positive. Describe the 5 "W"s: Who was it? Where were you? What did they say and how did they say it? How did you feel? When did they tell you in terms of the behavior they were addressing, was it too late, just in time, or prescriptive or future based; for the next time. Why do you think they gave you this feedback? What would you tell your colleagues about giving feedback based on your own experience?

2. Repeat this exercise but this time, describe a time when you received disempowering feedback that left you feeling frustrated, angry or misunderstood. Use the same 5 Ws to guide your reflection.

3. Based on your experience, what advice would you give your colleagues about giving feedback in the context of encouraging them or teaching them to use the ABCs method. Comparing and contrasting experiences is an impactful way of making the lesson come to life for others.

A benefit is what is uniquely in the individual's interest--not the benefit to you or the organization.

To discover peoples' motives we listen carefully to uncover their needs and wants. Use Maslow's hierarchy of needs to identify what the FB recipient cares about and make a direct link between their motives and the change in behavior you're asking them to take. Without authentic motivation, people don't change.

Print this image of Maslow's hierarchy and write the initials of people you engage with beside their primary motives. Now, formulate a specific and unique benefit for each person in the margins beside each level, for each person on your list.

Next: review the Harvard Business School research findings and decide what action will you take to create psychological safety for others creating a suitable context for giving feedback. Post your commitment.

Complete the Benefits/Cost Matrix for each individual as preparation for giving feedback.

Invite individuals who resist changing behavior, to complete the matrix themselves and share it with you.

Post your individual matrix what are the benefits and costs of incorporating the ABCs of feedback into your work and personal life.

For one week, observe other people's behaviors at meetings and keep a list of your observations on your smart phone or in a note book. Watch for verbal and non verbal cues that both encourage and discourage people's engagement during meetings. Summarize the key behaviors and post a simple list of the top 5 things people do or say in meetings to encourage deeper conversation, and 5 things they do or say to cut off conversation.

Make a simple check list with two columns labelled"Open" and "Closed" and keep score of how often either of these questions are asked, and observe the impact on others regarding engagement. Watch for energy level shifts, eye contact, body language, breathing and note any trends or conclusions you can draw from your observation and post to share your insights.

Create your own case study in this workbook. Use your own case, or use the case provided.

Practice the ABCs of feedback by preparing the 4 key elements in the workbook.

Commit to a personal action plan. Make a commitment to apply what you've learned and identify your KPIs your Key Performance Indicators to celebrate your success. List what would make your change in practicing feedback a success? List the indicators and make a note each week how many successes you experience.

Congratulations on making it to the conclusion of this course!

To your success!

Post Assessment: take this assessment upon completing the course.

Compare your answers to your pre-assessment.

Has your practice of delivering feedback changed after incorporating the skills from the course?

What have you noticed about these higher level, strategic areas of your leadership?

If your scores were marginal, congratulations--you are opening yourself to the possibility of higher level leadership. You have also undertaken foundational steps demonstrating your commitment to developing others through powerful and painless feedback steps. Continue your journey!

To your success!