Giving and Receiving Feedback for Management and Leadership

Purpose

The purpose of this course is to help you develop the skills of effectively giving feedback to others and receiving feedback in a way that leads to learning and improvement. This is “Straight-Talk.”

Objectives:

• To learn and to practice giving feedback to others in a manner that will facilitate learning by the other person.
• To learn and practice the skill of receiving feedback in a manner that will improve your own ability to learn from others.

Curriculum

1. I want to share why feedback causes anxiety and how we can reduce or eliminate that.
2. Some key words to use and not use.
3. I want to share a simple model that you can follow in constructing helpful feedback.
4. And, I will share a model that will help you become a great recipient of feedback.

In this lecture, Lawrence Miller discusses the importance of giving and receiving feedback, or "straight talk," in both personal and organizational contexts. Miller argues that failing to provide feedback can cheat both the subordinate and the manager out of opportunities for growth and improved performance. He shares two stories, one about the "Abilene paradox" and another about the collapse of Enron, to illustrate how a failure to provide feedback can cause individuals and organizations to go in the wrong direction. Miller encourages managers to have the courage to give factual straight talk, as failing to do so can cause injustice and lead to negative consequences for both individuals and organizations.

With Your Study Circle:

• Have you seen examples of this in your organization? Why?
• Have you ever been guilty of failing to give straight-talk? Why?
• When your manager gave you feedback, what was most helpful about that experience and what was most difficult?
• How do you think you might have inhibited others from giving you feedback?

In this lecture, Lawrence Miller discusses six values that he believes are important for great managers to exhibit in order to give and receive feedback effectively. Miller emphasizes the importance of integrity and honesty, caring for the well-being of employees, empathy to understand how others feel, humility to avoid arrogance, empiricism to be fact-based, and the pursuit of excellence through continuous improvement. He argues that exhibiting these values will make it easier for managers to give feedback, create a safe zone for employees to receive feedback, and help bridge the gap between where employees are and where they could be. Miller encourages managers to meditate on these values to become great managers.

With Your Study Circle...

Consider each of these values, or others, and ask yourself, how has each of these enabled me to give feedback, or inhibited me from giving feedback. How do you think recipients of your feedback have responded to these values?

1.Integrity

2.Caring

3.Empathy

4.Humility

5.Empiricism

6.Excellence of C.I.

Lawrence Miller shares some principles of feedback in his lecture. He suggests that feedback should be given immediately, frequently, and factually, with pinpointed positive behavior. He advises taking ownership for the feedback and listening with empathy to understand the perspective of the other person. Praising should be done in public, while negative feedback should be given in private. Delaying feedback and saving it up until the end of the year, for instance, will make it emotional and uncomfortable for both the giver and the receiver. In summary, giving feedback frequently, factually, and immediately with positive pinpointed behavior and listening with empathy can optimize human performance.

Our approach to someone, and certain phrases, can trigger a fight or flight response that inhibits the ability to process feedback.

When the emotional brain takes over from the thinking brain. When “fight or flight” takes over.

“You never….”

“You always…”

“People feel…”

“I don’t care…”

“You better, or else…”

Ask yourself these questions:

1. First, is the feedback I have to give intended to be genuinely helpful to the other person or group?
   
2. Can I express it in a way that will point to positive action, rather than only expressing anger?
   
3. Can I give the feedback in a way that does not demean the person, but rather focuses on specific behavior?
   

Identify an individual to whom you would like to give feedback. Describe the situation that prompts the need for feedback.

• Why will my feedback be helpful to this individual. Why should he/she care?
• How can you express your feedback in a positive way? What is the behavior you would like to increase, rather than decrease?
• Can I uplift the person while asking for a change in behavior?

Lawrence Miller discusses the importance of engagement in management and decision-making. He presents a continuum of engagement, with commanding and telling on the left and facilitating on the right. As managers mature, they should move towards facilitating decision-making by engaging in dialogue and problem-solving with their employees. Miller argues that this process may take longer, but it results in more lasting behavior change because the employees own the decision. By bringing out the best in employees and making it easy for them to engage in decision-making, Miller believes that managers can foster positive change and improve team performance.

1.Be sure that your intention is to be helpful to the other person or team.

2.Think it through. Be clear about what you want to say. Even if you are not sure about the reasons why you feel the way you do, you can share that uncertainty.

3.Emphasize the positive. You care about this person or group and you want to help them improve. Tell them why you care.

4.Be specific -- Avoid general comments or exaggerations. Don’t say “You always…” This will cause the other person to be defensive. Be specific about what and when the person or group does something.

5.Focus on pinpointed behavior rather than the person. The person is good and worthy (why you care) but the behavior is what is bothering you, and it is also what the person can change.

6.Own the feedback -- Use ‘I’ statements to indicate that this is how “I feel and others may not experience the same thing.”

7.Your manner and the feelings you express are important. Be direct, but be kind and helpful. Be sincere.

1. Ask permission (“I would like to share an observation, if you don’t mind.”)

2.When… (Describe the circumstance, time, etc.)

3.What happens (describe the specific behavior)

4.It makes me feel… (why it is a problem for me and possibly for others)

5.Ask for Reflection…(how do they experience this situation?).

6.A suggestion. It is always best not to act as if you know for certain what the right course of action is, but it is helpful to have a possible or suggested course of action.

7.Brainstorm Alternative courses of action.

8.Gain Commitment to Action.

9.Agree on Follow-up.

With your study partners…

• Each identify a situation in which you need to provide feedback.
• Think through how to apply the model.
• Practice with another partner playing the subject. Have the others observe.
• Give feedback to each other on how that felt, the likelihood of action, and any improvements that could be made.

In his lecture on goal setting and action planning, Lawrence Miller emphasizes the importance of setting specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and timely goals (SMART goals) for individuals and teams. He suggests using a simple action planning form to list the problem, solution, action steps, and who will do what and by when. Miller also stresses the significance of accountability and follow-up to ensure progress towards achieving the goals. By setting short-term targets, using graphs to track progress, and engaging individuals and teams in problem-solving, Miller believes that performance can be improved and continuously enhanced.

Lawrence Miller discusses the importance of continuous improvement and the scientific method in business. He notes that small increments of improvement, rather than one big change, lead to success. Miller uses the example of cancer treatment, where progress has been made through many tested and proven interventions. He suggests using the scientific method to continuously improve performance, either with individuals or teams. Miller also shares a story of how Mary, an employee at a textile mill, improved her performance from 35% to 120% standard operating efficiency through the use of feedback, data, and engagement in the improvement process. This, he explains, is continuous improvement and behavior shaping.

Lawrence Miller discusses guidelines for receiving feedback, emphasizing that understanding the person giving the feedback is trying to be helpful and not hurtful is important. He advises listening with empathy and seeking clarification if necessary, engaging in problem-solving to pinpoint specific behaviors that can be improved upon. Miller encourages reflecting back on what has been heard and taking responsibility for actionable items, noting that feedback is not an evaluation of overall performance. He also suggests practicing receiving feedback with peers and valuing continuous improvement and learning. Ultimately, taking responsibility and being willing to learn and change are key to optimizing learning in the organization.

In this lecture, Lawrence Miller encourages his audience to practice receiving feedback effectively. He suggests that if people are good at giving feedback, they should also be good at receiving it. Miller provides guidelines for receiving feedback, such as understanding that the person giving feedback is trying to be helpful, listening for actionable items, asking for clarification, engaging in problem-solving, summarizing what has been heard, taking responsibility, and not assuming that the feedback is an evaluation of overall performance. He suggests that the audience practice these guidelines by choosing a partner and asking them to provide feedback on something that needs improvement.

Lawrence Miller emphasizes the importance of continuous improvement and lifelong learning. He encourages peers to give feedback to each other constructively and with love, just as parents help their children grow. Miller also highlights that no one is perfect and that we are all on a journey towards becoming better versions of ourselves. Continuous improvement can be achieved by focusing on how we can improve our behavior and performance each day.