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Ralph Butcher

Course Description

Learn the theory, communication techniques, and exercises you will need to transform your relationship out of conflict and frustration, and into deep understanding and connection.

What you will Learn

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Course Description

Learn the theory, communication techniques, and exercises you will need to transform your relationship out of conflict and frustration, and into deep understanding and connection.

What you will Learn

  • A new way to communicate.
  • Why you were attracted to one another. And it is not for the reasons that you think.
  • What is really happening in your brain. Understanding this will help you find true happiness.
  • How your Defenses protected you in childhood, but block you from connecting in your relationship today.
  • Why you are having Conflict. The purpose of your Conflict. And what you need to do instead.
  • How to solve the Greatest Mystery of your relationship. Once you learn this, everything will begin to fall into place.
  • The things you do when you feel stressed are the things that “trigger” your partner the most. (The Turtle and Tiger Dance.)
  • How to stop blaming your partner for the pain you experienced in childhood.
  • How the Compassion Dialogue can reveal your unconscious Growth and Healing blueprint that lives in the unconscious part of your mind.

Perhaps you’ve been slipping into a HOT relationship, full of criticism and reactivity. Or maybe you’ve settled for a COLD relationship, where you live distant lives, lacking passion and intimacy.

Are you one of the 50 percent of Americans who are seriously thinking about divorce? If you answered YES to any of these questions, I want you to understand that breaking up is not inevitable. There is a solution.

In this course I’ll teach you what’s really happening in your relationship and what you can do about it. And if you are just beginning a relationship, this course will show you how to navigate through the Power Struggle when it hits during the next 2 years.

I’ll be teaching this course in a way that I hope you’ll find interesting. You won’t see my talking head. Instead, I’ve animated each video lesson with moving words and images. I hired a professional voiceover for the script and added music to keep you alert. I created 12 short videos (4-7 minutes) to break up the information into manageable chunks.

I’ve packed years of my professional experience (working with couples and presenting workshops) into each lesson. It is very important to follow these lessons in order. The material is complex so I start easy and end with a bang. You will benefit from watching these videos many times. I provide many exercises and handouts to support your work.

In last lesson you’ll witness a real couple using the Compassion Dialogue to unlock the mystery of a previous frustration that led to conflict. I added subtitles during the demonstration so you understand exactly where they are in the process. You can download the Compassion Dialogue script and follow along as well.

By the end of this course you understand your relationship journey from the moment you left the womb to your present day experiences. You will be able to identify your wounding and what you need to heal. You’ll discover what parts of yourself you gave up to survive in your family system. You’ll understand that you chose your partner specifically to teach you how to recover your Lost Parts. You’ll be able to communicate in a new way to reveal your unique relationship blueprint for growth and healing. And you will finally have a plan to divorce-proof your relationship, and give your partner the gift of forever.

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What's inside

Learning objectives

  • Understand the hidden reasons you picked your partner. and by the way, they're counterintuitive.
  • Define why you're having conflict, the purpose of your conflict, and what you need to do instead.
  • Identify the defenses that protected you in childhood, but block you from connecting in your relationship today.
  • Reconnect with the lost parts of yourself that you gave up after receiving negative feedback from your caretakers.
  • Use the dialogue scripts to discover your hidden relationship blueprint for growth and healing.
  • Modify your protective behaviors that cause your partner the most pain.

Syllabus

Students will learn how to best use this course.
Introduction
You will understand that your template for partner selection began forming during childhood.
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The defensive patterns and behaviors that protected you in childhood, are now blocking you from connecting with your partner and from feeling fully alive today. In this lesson you'll discover that your brain develops a template for partner selection that is highly influenced by your childhood experiences with others. Your brain template directs you toward a partner who will help you heal from the pain of the past, and recover your lost wholeness and aliveness.

How it all Began Quiz
Your Baggage From Childhood

Bag #1 represents your Unmet Needs.You will make a lot of noise about this bag in the form of Complaints and Criticisms, all directed at your partner, until you bring this information forward into consciousness.

Bag #3 represents your defenses. You'll learn how unmet needs contribute to the formation of defenses. An exercise in the video will help you discover one of your defenses, and how it 's related to your childhood wound.

Bag #2 represents your Lost Parts. These are the parts of yourself you restricted based on feedback from your caretakers. Because you gave up these natural parts, you no longer feel whole and complete. You pick a partner who will help you recover your parts. This lesson includes a written exercise to help you discover your Lost Parts.

Lost Parts Quiz
The Turtle And Tiger Dance

The Turtle and Tiger dance. When you watch this video, you’ll discover that the behavior your using to protect yourself from pain, is the behavior that causes your partner the most pain. You’ll learn how to modify the dance. Download the handout for a more detailed behavioral description.

Why You Chose Your Partner

The Relationship Match. This might be the most important video to help you understand why you chose your partner. You will begin to understand your blueprint and what you need to do to follow it successfully.

The Reasons You Begin To Wonder If You Made The Wrong Partner Choice

Did you know that there are 3 relationship stages? Stage 2 is called the Power Struggle. I like to call this the “Working” stage. If you don’t do the work, you’ll lay awake at night, wondering if you made the right partner choice. If you embrace the work, you will move into Stage 3, called Real Love.

Doing The Work To Transform Your Relationship

How The Imago Dialogue Works. I'll explain how this communication process works to reveal your unconscious blueprint for a happy and loving relationship.

You'll learn how to do the dialogue. And you can download: The dialogue directions, A simple dialogue, A detailed dialogue, An appreciation dialogue, A weekly check-in dialogue, And the Sender/Receiver responsibilities.

Demonstration Of A Real Couple Doing The Work

Watch this video to understand the lead-up to the Compassion Dialogue demonstartion.

You'll watch a video of a real couple doing the dialogue. The video is labeled with subtitles so you see exactly what is happening, when it is happening. You'll observe this couple transform their struggle in 20 minutes. A topic that used to produce conflict now becomes a source of connection. Make sure you download your copy of the Compassion Dialogue. Use it to transform a frustration into deep connection.

Good to know

Know what's good
, what to watch for
, and possible dealbreakers
Students who are struggling to connect with their partners will likely find detailed exercises and deep study on the subject in this course
If you are looking for a course where you will learn new communication skills to improve your relationships, this is a good choice
If you are in a relationship that is on the brink of breaking up and you want to explore a way of learning skills to improve your communication and connection, this course provides a good foundational base
If you are willing to invest a lot of time and effort into this course, you will find a lot to learn, as the instructor provides a lot of exercises and handouts to help the student's learning process
If you are searching to better understand your relationship with your partner and you are looking to find ways to improve the communication between you, this course offers a deep dive into communication that you and your partner can practice to foster a better understanding of each other
If you are not ready to invest a significant amount of time and effort to work through the course, you may not get the most out of it

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Activities

Be better prepared before your course. Deepen your understanding during and after it. Supplement your coursework and achieve mastery of the topics covered in Complete Relationship Bootcamp for Couples with these activities:
Start a 'Relationship Journal'
A Relationship Journal can help you track your progress and identify areas where you can improve.
Show steps
  • Choose a notebook or journal to use
  • Write down your thoughts and feelings about your relationship
  • Review your journal entries regularly
Review concepts of non-violent communication
This activity will help you refresh your understanding of the key principles of Non-Violent Communication, which is essential for building strong and healthy relationships.
Show steps
  • Read articles or watch videos about Non-Violent Communication
  • Practice identifying your feelings and needs
  • Practice expressing your feelings and needs in a non-violent way
Read 'Hold Me Tight' by Sue Johnson
This book provides a comprehensive guide to Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy, which can help you improve your communication and strengthen your relationship.
View Hold Me Tight on Amazon
Show steps
  • Read the book and take notes on the key concepts
  • Discuss the book with your partner
  • Apply the principles of Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy to your relationship
Three other activities
Expand to see all activities and additional details
Show all six activities
Practice the 'Compassion Dialogue'
The Compassion Dialogue is a powerful tool for improving communication and resolving conflict. This activity will help you practice using the Compassion Dialogue with your partner.
Show steps
  • Find a quiet place where you and your partner can talk privately
  • Take turns speaking and listening
  • Focus on expressing your feelings and needs in a compassionate way
Write a letter to your partner expressing your appreciation
This activity will help you express your gratitude for your partner and strengthen your bond.
Show steps
  • Think about all the things you appreciate about your partner
  • Write a letter expressing your appreciation
  • Give the letter to your partner
Join a support group for couples
Support groups can provide you with a safe and supportive environment to share your experiences and learn from others.
Show steps
  • Research different support groups for couples
  • Choose a support group that meets your needs
  • Attend support group meetings regularly

Career center

Learners who complete Complete Relationship Bootcamp for Couples will develop knowledge and skills that may be useful to these careers:
Marriage and Family Therapist
Marriage and Family Therapists help couples improve their relationships by teaching them how to communicate more effectively and resolve conflicts peacefully. The Complete Relationship Bootcamp for Couples can provide Marriage and Family Therapists with the skills and knowledge they need to help their clients build strong, lasting relationships. The course covers a variety of topics that are relevant to Marriage and Family Therapists, including communication techniques, conflict resolution, and relationship dynamics. By taking this course, Marriage and Family Therapists can gain the skills they need to help their clients achieve their relationship goals.
Social Worker
Social Workers help people overcome challenges and improve their lives. They work with individuals, families, groups, and communities to provide support, counseling, and resources. The Complete Relationship Bootcamp for Couples can provide Social Workers with the skills and knowledge they need to help their clients build strong, healthy relationships. The course covers a variety of topics that are relevant to Social Workers, including communication techniques, conflict resolution, and relationship dynamics. By taking this course, Social Workers can gain the skills they need to help their clients achieve their relationship goals.
Counselor
Counselors help people with a variety of mental health issues, including relationship problems. They provide support, guidance, and counseling to help people improve their lives. The Complete Relationship Bootcamp for Couples can provide Counselors with the skills and knowledge they need to help their clients build strong, healthy relationships. The course covers a variety of topics that are relevant to Counselors, including communication techniques, conflict resolution, and relationship dynamics. By taking this course, Counselors can gain the skills they need to help their clients achieve their relationship goals.
Psychologist
Psychologists help people with a variety of mental health issues, including relationship problems. They provide assessment, diagnosis, and treatment for mental health conditions. The Complete Relationship Bootcamp for Couples can provide Psychologists with the skills and knowledge they need to help their clients build strong, healthy relationships. The course covers a variety of topics that are relevant to Psychologists, including communication techniques, conflict resolution, and relationship dynamics. By taking this course, Psychologists can gain the skills they need to help their clients achieve their relationship goals.
Relationship Coach
Relationship Coaches help couples improve their relationships by teaching them how to communicate more effectively and resolve conflicts peacefully. The Complete Relationship Bootcamp for Couples can provide Relationship Coaches with the skills and knowledge they need to help their clients build strong, lasting relationships. The course covers a variety of topics that are relevant to Relationship Coaches, including communication techniques, conflict resolution, and relationship dynamics. By taking this course, Relationship Coaches can gain the skills they need to help their clients achieve their relationship goals.
Mediator
Mediators help people resolve conflicts peacefully. They work with individuals, families, and groups to facilitate communication and negotiation. The Complete Relationship Bootcamp for Couples can provide Mediators with the skills and knowledge they need to help their clients build strong, healthy relationships. The course covers a variety of topics that are relevant to Mediators, including communication techniques, conflict resolution, and relationship dynamics. By taking this course, Mediators can gain the skills they need to help their clients achieve their relationship goals.
Human Resources Manager
Human Resources Managers oversee the human resources department of an organization. They are responsible for a variety of tasks, including recruiting, hiring, training, and employee relations. The Complete Relationship Bootcamp for Couples may be helpful for Human Resources Managers who want to improve their communication and conflict resolution skills. The course covers a variety of topics that are relevant to Human Resources Managers, including communication techniques, conflict resolution, and relationship dynamics.
Teacher
Teachers provide instruction to students in a variety of subjects. They work with students of all ages, from preschool to college. The Complete Relationship Bootcamp for Couples may be helpful for Teachers who want to improve their communication and conflict resolution skills. The course covers a variety of topics that are relevant to Teachers, including communication techniques, conflict resolution, and relationship dynamics.
Nurse
Nurses provide care to patients in a variety of settings, including hospitals, clinics, and nursing homes. They work with patients of all ages, from newborns to the elderly. The Complete Relationship Bootcamp for Couples may be helpful for Nurses who want to improve their communication and conflict resolution skills. The course covers a variety of topics that are relevant to Nurses, including communication techniques, conflict resolution, and relationship dynamics.
Doctor
Doctors diagnose and treat diseases and injuries. They work with patients of all ages, from newborns to the elderly. The Complete Relationship Bootcamp for Couples may be helpful for Doctors who want to improve their communication and conflict resolution skills. The course covers a variety of topics that are relevant to Doctors, including communication techniques, conflict resolution, and relationship dynamics.
Lawyer
Lawyers represent clients in legal matters. They work with individuals, businesses, and organizations to provide legal advice and representation. The Complete Relationship Bootcamp for Couples may be helpful for Lawyers who want to improve their communication and conflict resolution skills. The course covers a variety of topics that are relevant to Lawyers, including communication techniques, conflict resolution, and relationship dynamics.
Salesperson
Salespeople sell products and services to customers. They work with individuals and businesses to identify their needs and provide them with the best possible solution. The Complete Relationship Bootcamp for Couples may be helpful for Salespeople who want to improve their communication and conflict resolution skills. The course covers a variety of topics that are relevant to Salespeople, including communication techniques, conflict resolution, and relationship dynamics.
Customer Service Representative
Customer Service Representatives provide support to customers over the phone, email, or chat. They work with customers to resolve problems, answer questions, and provide information. The Complete Relationship Bootcamp for Couples may be helpful for Customer Service Representatives who want to improve their communication and conflict resolution skills. The course covers a variety of topics that are relevant to Customer Service Representatives, including communication techniques, conflict resolution, and relationship dynamics.
Writer
Writers create content for a variety of purposes, including journalism, marketing, and fiction. They work with words to inform, entertain, and persuade. The Complete Relationship Bootcamp for Couples may be helpful for Writers who want to improve their communication and conflict resolution skills. The course covers a variety of topics that are relevant to Writers, including communication techniques, conflict resolution, and relationship dynamics.
Artist
Artists create visual art, including paintings, sculptures, and drawings. They work with a variety of materials to express their creativity and emotions. The Complete Relationship Bootcamp for Couples may be helpful for Artists who want to improve their communication and conflict resolution skills. The course covers a variety of topics that are relevant to Artists, including communication techniques, conflict resolution, and relationship dynamics.

Reading list

We've selected 15 books that we think will supplement your learning. Use these to develop background knowledge, enrich your coursework, and gain a deeper understanding of the topics covered in Complete Relationship Bootcamp for Couples.
Offers a research-based approach to building a strong and lasting marriage. It outlines seven principles that couples can follow to improve communication, resolve conflicts, and nurture their relationship.
Focuses on the importance of emotional connection and attachment in relationships. It offers practical exercises and strategies for improving communication and building stronger bonds.
Provides valuable insights into the different ways people express and receive love. Understanding love languages can greatly enhance communication and understanding within a relationship.
Presents findings from the Gottman Institute's research on marital stability. It provides insights into the factors that contribute to successful and unsuccessful marriages and offers guidance on how to strengthen relationships.
Provides a step-by-step guide to improving relationships in various contexts, including marriage, family, and friendships. It offers practical exercises and strategies for resolving conflicts, building trust, and creating strong bonds.
Explores the science behind romantic relationships and provides practical advice for building and maintaining healthy connections. It emphasizes the importance of emotional connection and attachment in relationships.
Focuses on the concept of Imago Relationship Therapy and provides guidance for couples to improve communication, resolve conflicts, and create a deeper connection. It emphasizes the importance of understanding and healing childhood wounds to build healthier relationships.
Explores the power of vulnerability and its impact on personal growth, relationships, and leadership. It encourages readers to embrace their vulnerability and use it as a catalyst for positive change and deeper connections.
Introduces the principles of Nonviolent Communication (NVC) and provides practical tools for improving communication and resolving conflicts. It emphasizes the importance of expressing needs and feelings in a clear and respectful manner.
Explores the concept of a growth mindset and its impact on success and personal development. It provides insights into the power of believing in one's ability to improve and learn, which can be beneficial for individuals seeking to enhance their relationships.
Offers a simple but profound guide to personal growth and happiness. It introduces four agreements that can help readers break free from limiting beliefs, live authentically, and create more fulfilling relationships.
Offers ancient wisdom and practical advice for finding happiness and contentment in life. It explores the principles of Buddhism and provides insights into how to cultivate positive emotions, overcome negative thoughts, and build meaningful relationships.
Personal memoir and practical guide to living a happier life. It provides insights and strategies for identifying sources of happiness and making changes to improve well-being. While not directly focused on relationships, it offers valuable lessons on self-awareness and the pursuit of fulfillment.

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